Morocco was my current setting: a blur of tagine, mint tea, and the constant, buzzing question of my life's purpose. I was sweating out the details of my existence until a whispered legend cut through the noise: a retreat in Spain featuring a legit Peruvian Shipibo Shaman bringing Ayahuasca to European soil. The psychonaut in me didn't hesitate. You could call it a calling; I called it booking a ferry ticket and praying I hadn't lost my mind.
That first taste of Ayahuasca was absolutely incredible. Seriously, that initial two-day retreat felt like someone took a spiritual power washer to my soul. Transformational heart openings that felt like finally unlocking a level I didn't even know existed. I learned to look at my own story through a less filtered, more uplifting lens. The transformation was real, and the consensus in my head was simple: This plant has more to show me.
I bounced the idea off Elmer, the Shipibo shaman, and without missing a beat, he hit me with the invitation: "Come to my village in the Amazon." A few months later, I was there. In la tierra de Mama Ayahuasca.
Let me be brutally honest: just making it to Elmer's village was an insane commitment. This wasn't a trendy, glamping retreat center. We took off from Pucallpa and boarded a boat for a 14-hour marathon down the Amazon River. Forget luxury cruise. This was survival mode. At certain points, the water was so low that we, the passengers, had to hop out and literally push the boat. The seats were brutal. I don't miss that boat ride, but man, was I stoked.
Here I was, the only Westerner, in a tiny village deep in the jungle. No cars. The pace was slow, hazy, and kinda beautiful, like living inside a dream filter. My plan was to shack up in Elmer's cabin for two months, sitting with the medicine every other day. My intention was lofty: ascend to a higher realm of consciousness and, crucially, learn to hold space for others. I wanted to bring this medicine back home.
And bring it back I did. But here's the unsexy, necessary truth I have to share: the jungle wasn't all light and transcendence. Years later, the dark side of Elmer started to creep into the picture. I was planning a massive retreat with him in Canada. I handled everything: booked his flight, slogged through the visa docs, and wired him the cash. Then he decided not to come. He took the money. He went radio silent. Ghosted.
Which brings me to my major, non-negotiable takeaway: Most shamans are not saints. They are humans. And sometimes, they are flawed, complicated, and yes, sometimes opportunistic humans. And yet, I had some of the most beautiful, transformational experiences of my life with a shaman who was decidedly not saintly.
Ultimately, the work is between you, the plant, and the Divine. The shaman is just the gatekeeper. Over time, I've found my deepest work happens when I sit with plant medicines by myself, tuning out the noise.
If you're feeling the call of the Amazon, skip the tourist traps near Cusco. Head to the real hubs: Iquitos or Pucallpa. Do your homework on centers. The vibe and safety matter more than anything. You have to 100% trust the medicine and the people holding space for you. If you go in with resistance, fear, or a constant desire to control the process, the medicine won't be able to do its magic.
The easy part is getting all those mind-blowing revelations in the ceremony. The hardest part is the integration: bringing those cosmic truths back to your messy, daily life. Commit to the work, and the medicine will hold you strong.
A 2018 study in Scientific Reports found that a single ayahuasca session produced rapid and sustained antidepressant effects. Physical preparation matters too: gut health, sleep quality, and inflammation levels all influence how the medicine works. For integration support in the months after, adaptogen and mood support products are worth building into your pre and post-retreat protocol.
For more on plant medicine and deep travel, read my account of Iboga initiation in Gabon. If you're planning a broader spiritual trip to Asia, the Yoga Teacher Training in Rishikesh post covers intensive inner work in a very different setting. And when you're ready to plan the logistics of your journey, the Travel Deal Seekers guide has the accommodation and flight tools I use.